Judge Dredd Blocks Trump’s Executive Order

Judge Dredd has once again made headlines—this time for overturning President Donald Trump’s policy of deporting violent criminals to harsh foreign prisons. Instead of incarceration, Dredd has ordered the criminals to be returned to the United States for immediate execution, declaring, “Justice delayed is justice denied.”

The controversial decision has left both Trump and ICE Director Tom Homan fuming. “This is judicial activism at its most extreme,” Trump said during a press conference. “We deported these criminals to the toughest prisons in the world, and now Dredd wants them back here for execution? It’s absurd. We’ll appeal this decision, just like we do every time an activist judge blocks my policies. But this guy—he’s a whole different kind of activist.”

Homan echoed Trump’s sentiments, stating, “I’ve dealt with activist judges before, but Judge Dredd takes it to a whole new level. He’s not just rewriting the law—he’s rewriting the Constitution. And frankly, I don’t think the Founding Fathers envisioned a guy in a helmet deciding who lives and dies.”

Dredd, unfazed by the criticism, defended his ruling with his trademark stoicism. “The law is the law,” he said, before adding, “And I am the law.” He went on to explain that the criminals’ return to the U.S. was necessary to ensure “swift and uncompromising justice,” citing the inefficiency of El Salvador’s prison system as a reason for his decision.

The ruling has sparked outrage among human rights groups, who argue that Dredd’s methods are barbaric and unconstitutional.

As the nation grapples with the implications of Dredd’s ruling, Trump’s legal team are preparing their appeal, though legal experts are skeptical about their chances of success. “Dredd doesn’t play by the rules,” said one analyst. “And when he says, ‘I am the law,’ he means it.”

More than one member of the Supreme Court has hinted that they will let Dredd’s ruling stand, as they are not about to interfere with the Judge, given his record. “I’m not touching it,” said one Justice who requested anonymity, “the last time we overturned one of his rulings, he beat the living tar out of three of us and put one out in the Cursed Earth…”